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Amateur Childbirth: Your Afterlife Is Cancelled - VINYL LPTitle: Your Afterlife Is Cancelled Artist: Amateur Childbirth Label: Blackest Ever Black Product Type: VINYL LP UPC: 5055869559515 Genre: Rock Release Date: 2017 09 22 Number of Discs: 1 This is Amateur Childbirth's "Christian Rock" album. The previous LP from Ivan Matthew Hick's solo project, 2013's Pripyat, concerned itself with the blighted belief systems of UFO worshippers. Your Afterlife Is Cancelled expands this compelling solo project's field
Title: Your Afterlife Is CancelledArtist: Amateur Childbirth
Label: Blackest Ever Black
Product Type: VINYL LP
UPC: 5055869559515
Genre: Rock
Release Date: 2017-09-22
Number of Discs: 1
This is Amateur Childbirth's "Christian Rock" album. The previous LP from Ivan Matthew Hick's solo project, 2013's Pripyat, concerned itself with the blighted belief systems of UFO worshippers. Your Afterlife Is Cancelled expands this compelling solo project's field of enquiry to look at a wider array of "religious anomalies": cults, for want of a better word. Each song is about a different such anomaly. To call Hicks's vision apocalyptic would be to underplay it's cruelty. The Bible's rampant sadism pales in comparison. This is a world where faith - in a god or gods, in astrology, morality, or any meaning whatsoever - is merely a prelude to punishment. His lyrics are vivid glossaries of pain, abjection and indignity; the songs' protagonists swim in blood, piss, shit, and ejaculate. Eschatology and scatology are indivisible here. Drugs are rampantly abused, albeit to little benefit. There are scalpel-flashes of humor in David's wordplay, rhyming and dour Brisbane diction - but this offers scant consolation for the songs' embattled subjects, who wait, in vein, for salvation, while crows peck out their eyes, blood pours from their ears, and psoriasis ravages their skin. These words, for all their pessimism and body-horror, are cradled in minimalist, folk-rock arrangements that are quite dazzling in their beauty and grievously earned simplicity: Hicks's monochord strum embellished with subtle violin, synthesizer, and percussion shading. Amateur Childbirth's caustic end-times worldview inevitably prompts comparisons with Current 93, but also a wider (non-)tradition of caustic and disturbed loner psych that includes Simon Finn, Patrik Fitzgerald, Robyn Hitchcock, Peter Jefferies, and Roy Harper. Your Afterlife Is Cancelled is a depressive tour de force from one of the most crushingly eloquent voices in the Australian underground.
Tracks:
1.1 My Throat = Abyss of Tar
1.2 Emissary of Light
1.3 Alive with Desire
1.4 Portents to Beauty
1.5 Iridescent Effigy to Hades
1.6 In Greenland, Alone
1.7 Lithium Hangover Ordinary Morphine
1.8 High Calvinism
1.9 All Doomed
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4.9 ★★★★★
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★★★★★ 3
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Color: Black, Size: X-Large
This item looked nicer in the picture. What I received was not what I expected.
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Reviewed in the United States on May 2, 2026
★★★★★ 5
Soft and comfortable
Color: Burgundy, Size: Large, Color: Burgundy, Size: Large
This shirt surprised me by how comfortable it is. I usually try to get cotton shirts, or shirts that at least have a little cotton in them, but this shirt is 100% synthetic. Despite that it is very soft on the skin and seems to breathe well.
In polo shirts I’m usually between a medium and a large, but if I’m not able to try it on, I will usually go to the large. I did in this case, and I probably could have used the medium. But a little extra fabric isn’t really a problem with this kind of shirt, and I feel it just gives more room to breathe.
There were no loose threads and the seams are even. The burgundy color is rich, and the collar has a unique pattern that received mixed reviews from my panel of family members, but that comes down to a matter of taste, and I like it. With this quality, I expect it to last through many wearings and washings.
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Reviewed in the United States on May 2, 2026
★★★★★ 5
Comfortable & Cool Golf Polo - Perfect for Hot Florida Days
Color: Navy, Size: Large
This shirt is made with a soft pique fabric that feels comfortable against the skin. The moisture-wicking and quick-dry material keeps you cool and dry, which works especially well in the hot Florida heat. It has nice 4-way stretch for good mobility, a stylish plaid collar with three buttons, and ribbed cuffs for a clean look. The shirt stays relatively wrinkle-free and is versatile enough for golf, casual office wear, or everyday use. Overall, a solid, comfortable polo that performs well in warm weather.
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Reviewed in the United States on May 22, 2026
★★★★★ 5
This shirt checked all the boxes, comfort, fit and feel.
Size: 3X-Large, Color: Teal 02, Size: 3X-Large, Color: Teal 02
OMG! what a nice shirt. The pattern is awesome and the material is very soft and light weight. It is so breathable. Material has a bit of stretch so it very comfortable sitting or standing and does not wrinkle. I will be ordering at least on more in another color
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Reviewed in the United States on May 18, 2026
★★★★★ 5
Surprisingly awesome. Seriously. And I hate buying clothes.
Size: X-Large, Color: Black
I'm 6'1", 215 with large shoulders and chest. "Athletic dad-bod." Nothing fits me perfectly. I'm constantly stuck between an XL and XXL shirt, and a 37x31 pant---so literally nothing fits me and if you're a big guy, we all know that most polo shirts look like crap and fit like garbage bags.
The shiny tone first made me skeptical. I wasn't even going to take it out of the package. But for $19, I said screw it.
It fits really well. Not slim fit, but not "Ralph Lauren trash bag regular fit." It's soft like textured silk. It looks good and is the perfect length if you're 6'-6'3.
And no--I know your first thought with the texture and shine is "does it look like a cheesy club shirt on a NJ Italian guy?" Shockingly, no...it's actually really nice (yeah--I had the same thought).
It's stretchy. It's relatively form fitting, and it's cool to the touch.
I immediately bought 3 more.
For $19--just buy it. You won't regret it.
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Reviewed in the United States on December 21, 2025